steve m
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| posted on 12/11/14 at 08:11 PM |
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Does my bum look big in this (not mine)
So, I come home from work, 12 hour shift, im knackered, and wife is bla bla bla , im not listening, (as usual)
then she decides to show me, a new top she bought for a doo we HAVE to go to, and she tries it on, and asks
............................................................................................................................................
The bloody question
Do i like it , mm yes.
does it look alright , mmm yes,
does it fit me (her) mm yes,
and then the argument starts, I don't show any emotion, I don't know if it fits or not
How the F***K do I know if it makes her tits look bigger or what, and lastly
so she's not speaking to me
DO I CARE, NO!!!
so im upstairs in the spare room, (nice bed) watching what I want, and on the laptop, got a couple of beers,
BLISS .....................................................
Thats was probably spelt wrong, or had some grammer, that the "grammer police have to have a moan at
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blakep82
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| posted on 12/11/14 at 08:14 PM |
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Presumably you know how big her jugs normally look?
________________________
IVA manual link http://www.businesslink.gov.uk/bdotg/action/detail?type=RESOURCES&itemId=1081997083
don't write OT on a new thread title, you're creating the topic, everything you write is very much ON topic!
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ash_hammond
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| posted on 12/11/14 at 08:19 PM |
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I got slapped a few weeks back....
Does this skirt make my bum look big?
I replied. "No your bum makes your bum look big"
.: www.mac1motorsports.co.uk | www.m1moc.com :.
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nick205
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| posted on 12/11/14 at 08:21 PM |
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Steve, Steve, Steve!
You should have mastered this by now. Always answer quickly, firmly and positively.
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SCAR
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| posted on 12/11/14 at 08:23 PM |
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Mrs "Does my bum look big in these trousers"
Me "Your bum would look big in Australia"
No sense of humour some people
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TimC
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| posted on 12/11/14 at 09:03 PM |
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Tell her you've been offered some help to make an appropriate judgement.
We just need some pics.
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snapper
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| posted on 12/11/14 at 09:09 PM |
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I'm single (again) now
Not mastered the responses, probably never will
However it's always a leading question
You buy a woman any clothes and there is no way you will succeed
To tight your insensitive
To loose "you think I'm that fat"
The right size and the dress size will be wrong
It fits but the lable says 16 not 14 or less
Your all doomed
Except me
I eat to survive
I drink to forget
I breath to pi55 my ex wife off (and now my ex partner)
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daniel mason
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| posted on 12/11/14 at 09:18 PM |
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I'm one of the younger generation on here (33now) and regularly get myself banished to the spare room! But I do it on purpose so i can sit with
a few beers and watch what I want.
I'd say remember how YOU caused this scenario and do it every time you fancy watching g something decent on the box!
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Rod Ends
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| posted on 12/11/14 at 10:31 PM |
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Take Courage ad
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Mr Whippy
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| posted on 12/11/14 at 11:58 PM |
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just say its not the dress but all the cake a chocolate you scoffed that makes your bum look big
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spiderman
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 03:46 AM |
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If you wish to be banished to the spare room try this.
When you come home from work say ..
" Wow honey you look great, have you lost weight ? Turn around... oh no there it is.
Spider
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motorcycle_mayhem
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 07:42 AM |
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It's when they won't fit in the car..... hilarious, very, to watch them try and squeeze the rear end in. JP (especially) didn't
design the older R1oT for passengers with fat bottoms (or long legs). Westfield got the idea quickly, as have most, make it Wide, very.
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steve m
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 08:31 AM |
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Some good responses,
Ive remembered the scenario and could use it at a later "I want some me time" in the spare room
Thats was probably spelt wrong, or had some grammer, that the "grammer police have to have a moan at
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mcerd1
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 09:06 AM |
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quote:
Originally posted by snapper
I'm single (again) now
Not mastered the responses, probably never will...
I'm not sure its possible to master the responses - I'm just glad that my GF is quite straightforward and doesn't play the
"you think I'm that fat" game too much...
the general rule I go with if I don't want banished is does the item of clothing in question make you more or less inclined to rip it off her
and throw it on the floor - as we all know that clothes look best on the bedroom floor 
I don't think she'd want me to buy her clothes without her being there to try them on and if we do go shopping she only spend a max. of
10min in a shop (so that makes my life a bit easier) nice underwear is a different story though, but I'm not complaining about that and I know
what size that is
-
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fesycresy
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 09:10 AM |
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quote:
Originally posted by steve m
DO I CARE, NO!!!
so im upstairs in the spare room, (nice bed) watching what I want, and on the laptop, got a couple of beers,
BLISS .....................................................
Porn is only a short term solution, put the lap top away, go and apologise
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
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r1_pete
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 09:10 AM |
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quote:
Originally posted by mcerd1
she only spend a max. of 10min in a shop
My You're one patient chap....
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TheGiantTribble
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 09:12 AM |
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Personally I find a technique called deflection helps in these situations...
1. Change the subject, 'hold on a minute love, I'm just going to put the kettle on', just getting changed', going to the
loo...what ever to by your self some time, problem is they generally have been waiting for this very moment and won't drop the subject.
2. Be warned this needs some acting abilities, and also the ability not to take yourself seriously. As soon as they hit you with the question, throw a
tantrum... 'Oh its always about you', 'you never comment on what I ware', 'life does not revolve around x y and
z', or the ultimate 'you never show this much attention about my kit car' add a stamping foot just for enforcement, throw your hands
in the air, and if it's works milk it for all it's worth, hand her a spanner.
Oh course it can blow up in your face and you find yourself sleeping in the shed!!!
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HowardB
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 09:24 AM |
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"It's all about that bass"
video
Howard
Fisher Fury was 2000 Zetec - now a 1600 (it Lives again  and goes zoom)
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jeffw
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 09:35 AM |
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iyTTX6Wlf1Y
Ummm....like this one better
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trextr7monkey
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 10:00 AM |
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quote:
Originally posted by spiderman
If you wish to be banished to the spare room try this.
When you come home from work say ..
" Wow honey you look great, have you lost weight ? Turn around... oh no there it is.
Getting back to the car theme:
Variation on the TR7 joke when launched some Italian designer walked round it and said "Oh no They have done it to the other side as
well!"
Bstd!
atb
Mike
http://www.flickr.com/photos/14016102@N00/ (cut and paste this dodgey link)
Our most recent pics are here:
http://s129.photobucket.com/albums/p211/trextr7monkey/
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SteveWallace
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 10:52 AM |
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A friend of mine (and I really do mean someone else and not me!), when his wife asked what she was getting for Christmas replied 'fatter'.
Needless to say, they are now divorced.
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jollygreengiant
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 11:19 AM |
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The problem as I see it is that you have not trained your potential wives right from the start. You should have begun with an opening line similar to
that which I used. The VERY FIRST thing I ever said to my wife was :
"By god your ugly!".
Yep. that's right, took her a week to speak to me, but by then she was hooked. I just had to explain to her that the line was from Faulty Towers
which was on TV at the time and I was thinking of that at the moment she turned round and looked at me while I was running through the lines of the
latest program episode and its not my fault if she took it the wrong way and didn't give me a chance to explain it there and then, oh and do you
fancy dating me.
The School bus has a lot to answer for.
edit bit. Oh and the other trick is NEVER EVER give a straight or honest answer. After a short time they NEVER ask those dangerous questions again
because they know what answer they will get.
[Edited on 13/11/14 by jollygreengiant]
Beware of the Goldfish in the tulip mines. The ONLY defence against them is smoking peanut butter sandwiches.
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dhutch
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 12:43 PM |
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quote:
Originally posted by motorcycle_mayhem
It's when they won't fit in the car..... hilarious...
As a narrow westfield owner, with grp seats that a far from wide, I have seen this a few times.
Fortunately by girlfriend fits without issue, but I have several friends that have needed help getting out again or just declined to try!
Daniel
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SCAR
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 01:23 PM |
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I was 58 last week and been with my wife since I was 19 and I haven't been (clothes) shopping with her yet. So lots of new things still to look
forward too. Only got married 3 years ago after a 30 year engagement.
Just wanted to be sure.
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RK
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| posted on 13/11/14 at 01:42 PM |
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It is a setup. Nothing you can answer will suit. Best of luck to you though!!
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