I like this kid!!!
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> LITTLE KENNY ON MATHS
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> A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and
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> you
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> shoot one of them, how many will be left?" She calls on little KENNY .
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> He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot."
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> The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but I like your
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> thinking."
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> Then little KENNY says, "I have a question for YOU.
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> There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream:
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> One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream.
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> The
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> second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone. The third is
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> biting
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> the top of the ice cream.Which one is married?"
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> The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, "Well, I suppose the one
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> that's
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> gobbled down the top and sucked the cone."
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> To which Little KENNY replied, "The correct answer is 'the one with
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> wedding ring on," but I like your thinking."
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> Little KENNY returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.
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> Why?" asks the father?
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> The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3,'" I said "6", replies KENNY .
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> But that's right!" says his dad.
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> Yeah, but then she asked me "How much is 3x2?'"
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> What's the fukin`difference?" asks the father.
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> That's what I said!"
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> LITTLE KENNY ON ENGLISH !
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> Little KENNY goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going
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> to
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> learn multi-syllable words, class.
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> Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?"
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> KENNY says "Mas-tur-bate."
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> Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, little KENNY , that's a mouthful."
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> Little KENNY says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."
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> LITTLE KENNY ON GRAMMAR !
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> Little KENNY was sitting in class one day.All of a sudden, he needed
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> go
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> to the bathroom. He yelled out, "Miss Jones, I need to take a piss!!"
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> The teacher replied, 'Now, KENNY , that is NOT the proper word to use
> in
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> this situation. The correct word you want to use is 'urinate.'
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> Please use the word 'ur-i-nate' in a sentence correctly, and I will
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> allow
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> you to go."
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> Little KENNY , thinks for a bit, and then says, "You're an eight, but
> if
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> you
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> had bigger boobs , you'd be a TEN!"
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> One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a
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> of
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> hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same
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> twice.
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> First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father
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> my
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> mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."
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> Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called on little
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> Michael.
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> My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully."
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> She said, "Excellent, Michael!" Then the teacher reluctantly called on
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> little KENNY .
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> Last night at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was
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> pregnant, and he said 'Beautiful, just fukin` beautiful!'"
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> LITTLE KENNY ON GETTING OLDER
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> Little KENNY was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar
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> another.
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> After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you
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> know
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> eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot
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> your
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> teeth, and make you fat."
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> Little KENNY replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."
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> The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?"
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> Little KENNY answered, "No, he minded his own fukin` business."